Thursday, June 5, 2014

Day 125/365 - Seems Like A Milestone?

Possibly because I'm tired?

The past few weeks have been pretty crazy. I've been throwing myself into working every hour I can which has translated into a lot of stress throughout the entire family. On top of all our other stresses (health, school, etc.), this has put all of us on edge. 
Myself in particular. 

And yesterday, as I was restraining an all out EJ tantrum, he ended up with a bruise. I know the how and the why he has it. He's a strong kid and it takes a lot more of my own strength than I want to use to keep him from hurting me. And after the tantrum had subsided and I found it on him, he was the one to not care. 
But holy heck. That little mark on him, where my thumb was as I held him back from kicking and biting me, it cut my soul. 
And it manifested all the stress we've been under. 
And it made me stop today, while I was working, and look at his Lego creation. 
And it made me sit and read another chapter of Game of Thrones to him when he asked. 
And it made me take a deep breath and not yell at A. about the laundry piles. 
And it made me take another deep breath and understand that the dishwasher won't be broken forever and that it's okay to do the dishes in small spurts. 
And it made me smile at A. as she went to her first grown up fancy banquet on her own. 
And it made me say 'I love you' just a few more times - and not raise my voice nearly as much today. 

And it made me remember to love and appreciate these kids and remember to enjoy them even when I'm working, too. 


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